The art of persuasion has not been gifted to everyone. Some people are naturally convincing in their efforts to get others to do things. But for many, it’s a skill that needs honing. The foundation lies in effective communication, as is the basis for positive feedback in any situation.
Looking at this topic from a business perspective. Since those are most often the times when you need to work the hardest to attempt to convince another individual, client, or stakeholder to come on board, the truth of the matter is that many of us are utterly awful at the process.
Why is it so difficult for people to navigate the power of persuasion? There’s not really a guide or a course to show the secrets on how to propose your ideas and how to convince someone that they’re worth an effort.
Without that knack, there are struggles and many instances of crashing and burning. Where do you go wrong, and how can you learn to convince
people in any situation to do what you want, even apart from the work environment?
Let’s look more closely at how people mishandle the situation and what they should be doing instead in order to be more persuasive.
The ways to convince someone
Most of the time, people need to use a majority of their persuasive tactics on the job when making proposals with clients, stakeholders, and even new companies in an attempt to do business.
These moments determine your talent for convincing others to do what you want or need, reflecting back into other areas of your life. Your style of effective communication translates to every aspect of your life.
If you’re struggling to convince people to choose your work, likely you’re not having much luck establishing a rapport in your social circle when you need or want something either.
Check out the things you might be doing wrong, and then work on these to be more convincing with those around you.
1. Being manipulative
Persuasion does not equate to manipulation. There’s a vast and distinct difference, and everyone, especially those closest to you, can discern the difference. Manipulation is cunning.
It’s an attempt to gain control or use a power play over another person with ill intentions, and that’s the furthest place from where someone hoping to persuade another person wants to go.
The idea with persuasion is to open a conversation with a dialog full of open-ended questions about the subject of your need without letting on upfront that you have a need.
The person will go into detail about their knowledge of the topic. While the goal is to have the person handle a situation you either can’t or need some help with, the tactic is essentially getting the individual to acknowledge their expertise so you can then let them know your conundrum.
From that point, the hope is that the person will offer or believe it to be their idea to help out and not something they need to be convinced to do.
2. Don’t negate their value nor downplay your capabilities
In the case of a mate from whom you prefer to help you with maybe some household tasks, the priority is not to let them feel as though their help is essential, like your wellness depends on it.
That is a power play, controlling, and unfair in a partnership. Of course, in that scenario, a significant other will feel obligated to do the work to avoid hardships for you. But they will likely end up resenting you for the tactic.
Instead of carrying yourself in such a way, it’s much healthier to let your partner know that you can absolutely manage the duties that you have ahead of you. Still, their involvement would be valuable and appreciated because the individual is essential to you and now the work that needs to be handled.
A beloved should always feel as though they have the power to choose and never be made to believe that your very well-being depends on them. That’s stifling.
3. Provide sincerity with compliments; honesty goes far
Whether colleagues, romantic partners, or close friends, people like sincerity, honesty, and kindness. When you’re being disingenuous in order to get what you want, it will usually translate, especially if that’s not your usual manner.
If you’re being sincere, make sure to compliment the individual’s strengths and why you find them to be a critical component for helping with your specific circumstance. Let them know you recognize you’ll get the best outcome if you have their expertise and knowledge.
Most people who feel appreciated for their talents will jump at the opportunity to showcase these. That’s especially true if a partner asks their significant other to handle a specific task for them.
It will be necessary for the mate to do the best job possible because you have such faith in their abilities.
4. Bring alliances to your side to help with the persuasion
If persuasion is a weakness for you, perhaps other people should take the reins, especially if it’s a work situation. Perhaps there is a significant client with whom you need to try to approach in an effort to do business in a freelance capacity.
While your work can speak volumes on its own, there is an interview process where you must convince the client you’re the right one for the project.
In this instance, alliances are always beneficial because they can speak to your strengths, provide a live reference that can look proactive during the interview process, and you won’t need to do as much convincing on your own.
You don’t want a massive gathering, perhaps one or two sitting by your side. Make sure these are people with a natural rapport with the capacity to sway decisions.
5. One time might not be enough
While you want to be persistent and consistent, you also need to know when to let the issue rest for the moment. Sometimes an issue isn’t resolved the first time you attempt to persuade someone to take on a responsibility they might not feel up for.
Perhaps your partner doesn’t believe he’s the right one for the situation you’re trying to sign him up for. That doesn’t mean you need to back down or let it go.
It merely means to let him think about what you’ve introduced in your initial conversation until you can present further evidence to support your beliefs.
The next time you go with your request, ensure you’re consistent in why you feel your partner is who you need with you on the task so he realizes you’re serious and can sense your passion on the issue.
After probably persuading and citing the reasons a few times, you’ll likely be able to convince the guy.
6. Show that you’re convinced and confident
People who are weak in their persuasion are usually not incredibly confident in their convictions. On occasions when you make proposals for work, if you are poor in the interview process, it might be because you haven’t established sufficient trust in your own abilities quite yet.
When you aren’t convinced you’re capable, a client isn’t going to take that risk.
Building your confidence behind the work you produce is vital if you intend to succeed in the industry you represent.
If you need to take classes to hone your skills, present it to peers for honest feedback, practice interviews, and make proposals with a significant other allowing them to critique your presentation.
It would help if you also made it a practice to try to persuade those closest to you to do things for you so you can build that as one of your skills since being persuasive seems to be a weakness for you.
The more successful you are, the greater your confidence will become. You’ll start to convince yourself that you can persuade anyone of anything.
Final thought
The power of persuasion is a tool based on communication. Communication is key in any relationship, whether business, familial, or romantic, in creating positive feedback, resolution, or solving an issue.
When you use communication to convince someone to do something for you, it’s essential to use it effectively.
That means building the other individual up for their strengths. Compliments go far with everyone, but these need, to be honest, and sincere for the optimum outcome.
Further, it’s crucial that you believe in yourself and that you’re convinced of your talent before you can convince someone else of something. With a partner or people beloved to you, it’s much easier to be confident even if it’s not your strength.
Often persuading a mate is something most people can do pretty readily. The problem is when it comes to situations outside the home when clients or colleagues recognize that lack of confidence.
While your work will draw the customer, your proposal and interview must convince them. You need to work on that skill until it’s honed to perfection if you hope to succeed.
