Nowadays, people protect their mobile numbers for varied reasons but primarily because of scams and hacks that occur. Providing it to someone unfamiliar despite a spark of romantic interest can put you and possibly the work that you do at risk.
If there’s a real connection, it’s often better to take his number or provide an alternative means for reaching you, like social networks.
Of course, if your gut tells you this guy is no threat, it’s OK to give your number and take his. You have the luxury of breaking your own boundary when you trust your instincts. But what does the whole thing mean?
Was it an instant attraction after a brief interaction? Did you spend a lovely evening chatting at a party without missing a beat? Or have you been digitally dating for a while now, and it’s come to the point of either talking/texting by phone or ending the exchange?
Let’s look at some of the “whys” this virtual stranger might want to reach out with a mobile conversation.
Why would a guy ask for your mobile number?
When you make the acquaintance of what appears to be a potential new romance, the motivation for his asking for your mobile number could seem relatively evident, but you don’t want to jump to conclusions.
There’s a range of reasons for someone to make such a request; make sure you consider every possibility.
The guy senses an intense degree of chemistry with you
First and foremost, if you run into someone briefly but neither of you wants to run off without having a way to reach back out to the other, it’s because there’s an instant spark or connection you can’t deny.
Before agreeing to offer the number, you should make sure the motive is not just purely about a hookup. You should be able to tell if the man is anxious to know you before suggesting the exchange.
Maybe if he’s with a friend, dragging the guy away from your conversation takes some effort. That’s a sure sign that he wants to continue the chat.
He’s not the one
When approached for your number, the person asking is not the one interested in you. A friend is roaming the perimeter who finds you attractive but doesn’t dare to come up to you himself.
Hopefully, this person is nice enough to disclose that his friend is the one who wants the mobile details. That way, you can let him know you won’t give your number to just anyone, nor will you give it to a stranger.
In a rush
The two of you began a conversation while each was in a time crunch and needed to run back to work or another commitment. The obvious thing to do was ask for your number so the individual could continue discussing the subject via mobile or text.
That isn’t an indication he wants to be more than a virtual stranger you were able to captivate with conversation. Still, it doesn’t mean it couldn’t lead to more since he did find you interesting. That’s always positive, but was there a spark?
The man wants to go out with you
The interaction has the potential for romance since you can tell the new acquaintance finds you more than appealing and is curious about what you think on virtually every subject. Does that mean he wants to go out? When this guy asks for a mobile number, it’s evident he will be calling to make plans for a date.
You’ll recognize interest when there’s plenty of eye contact; you’re the focus for the entire evening, and not only is there refreshing conversation but heavy flirting.
A new friendship can be just that
When you meet a new person at an event or social gathering, sometimes they just want to add you to their social circle. Not everyone looks for a new mate when they go to a party.
When a person sits and chats with you throughout the evening and suggests exchanging numbers, don’t make assumptions; pay attention to how the evening plays out.
Maybe the man was pointing out other attractive people in the room, mentioned a significant other, or even said how nice it would be to have another friend. You should undoubtedly follow the clues and decide if you want to be friend-zoned or if you prefer to keep your number to yourself.
How do you respond when a guy asks for your number?
A priority when responding to someone who wants your mobile number is always to be honest and upfront. That doesn’t have to mean hurting someone’s feelings.
You can turn someone down in a way that’s positive instead of revealing what might be reflective of how you genuinely feel about their personality or character. And maybe you don’t want to turn them down.
You might be receptive to the idea of getting to know them better in this context. Let’s see how you can tell the guy how you feel either way.
Phony numbers make you appear disrespectful
To save from hassle, people will often take the deceptive path when attempting to avoid giving someone their mobile number. Usually, it’s viewed as simpler than having to deal with attitude or a potential conflict over preferring not to give the information.
In these cases, people will usually give the individual a fake number. This way, they figure they won’t ever have to deal with the person again. Karma is impressive, though. Usually, it comes back with you running into the person again.
Either they’ll call you out to make you squirm in your disrespect, or they’ll ignore you. Most make that call.
You don’t want to appear too eager
If you’re getting along and can tell the new acquaintance is interested in you, you might want to give him your number, and it’s OK to do that. Make sure you’re reading the signs clearly, and that you’re both on the same page before you make a move.
Maybe you run in the same social circles, and each time he seeks you out to spend time with. That’s a major indication he enjoys your company and probably wants to pursue something more than just running into each other.
If he’s asked for the number and you have yet to give it, be cool by asking to see his phone and then punch in your digits. You’ll find out soon enough if you were right about his interest.
Don’t string the man along
If you have zero attraction to this person and no intention of anything happening between you other than possibly a friendship but more likely a mere acquaintance, don’t give him your number. Doing so will encourage the idea that you want to chat with the possibility of going out at some point.
No one will benefit if you intend to ignore this man after exchanging. The only thing that will come of this is someone will go through rejection, which is super uncool.
In this situation, to avoid that altogether, it’s advantageous to think of a reason for not being able to give your private details that won’t hurt much, even if that means exaggerating.
A creative approach that has no strings attached
When a gentleman initiates that he finds you attractive and wants to learn more about you, followed by requesting your number, a creative response would be to have business cards with your name and mobile number printed on them.
He’ll know you’re down for a further conversation and getting to know him better. Your approach will suggest a more simple beginning. Maybe after a few chats, you can arrange to see each other at a mutual activity, perhaps an upcoming holiday dance or a sporting event.
Your phone is only for work purposes
When someone you don’t know and hasn’t had an opportunity to really get a feel for asks for your number, it’s essential to be safe but also respectful. The ideal way to avoid any possible sour feelings is to simply let the person know your phone is only used for business purposes; you don’t pass the number out for social reasons.
You honestly don’t owe any further explanation to someone you don’t know. That should be sufficient to walk away from the conversation then.
How long should you wait for the guy to call
A whole methodology to the male’s call-back process flabbergasted me. The bottom line is that someone who is sincerely interested and authentic won’t find a need to play games. Usually, this person will give a quick call either that day or the following day to connect.
The idea is that the guys are basically just nervous and don’t want to appear too eager. The time spent painstaking over when’s the right time, what they should talk about, and how it will appear is just a bunch of undue stress. If you like someone and they’re interested in you, give them a call to say hello.
Final thought
Whether you give your number to someone who asks for it or not is a matter of what your instinct tells you. You’ll get a feeling for the situation, how the interaction moves along, and whether this person is genuine. Don’t do it if you’re unsure or can’t read the signals.
It’s something that should be obvious and feel right. Mobile numbers are a key part of your identity plus a component of your business. Many people don’t merely pass their numbers out haphazardly. It’s something to put careful forethought into.
